Cars: The Lost Opel Commercial

If you live in the United States, then there's a high chance you've probably never heard of a Car company called Opel. Opel is a German car manufacturer that has been in operation since the eighteen-sixties, and they still exist to this very day. They have 10 operating facilities across the globe, unlike Toyota, Chevrolet, Honda, or other well-known Car manufacturers that everybody knows of. I don't know much about the company, so I can't give you too much information about it.

Well, a friend of a friend of mine told me that there was a weird Opel commercial that was very disturbing, it couldn't be shown on TV. His dad worked for the Opel company sometime in the year 2006. He said his dad started working there around the time Pixar's new movie, Cars was coming out in theaters worldwide. Pixar made a deal with Opel in 2006 to feature the Cars characters in their promotions to promote the movie worldwide. My friend told me that the disturbing Opel commercial is locked away somewhere in Pixar's headquarters, and Pixar doesn't want anybody to see it. However, he said that he had a video file saved on his computer. He sent me the video file of the commercial to my computer from a Google Drive link and told me to never view it. I agreed to the decision, and decided to watch some Family Feud on TV.

The next day, I was on my way to school. However, when I was walking to the Bus Stop, I saw a car that looked just like an Opel vehicle. As I continued my walk to the bus stop, I kept on seeing more and more Opel vehicles. I thought I was just messing around. That was when I saw the School Bus pull up. I ran so fast to it, and I was so close to missing the bus, but I was lucky that I went on in time. I arrived at school about 5 minutes later, but just when the bus pulled up to the school, I noticed all the cars in the parking lot were Opel. I thought Opel didn't make cars in the USA. I shrugged it off and walked into my School. I had a pretty good day so far. The day seemed pretty normal until around the time when I was going to lunch. As I was going to the cafeteria to go eat some lunch, I heard people talking about some weird episodes of a cartoon that I've never even seen nor heard of.

I walked into the cafeteria and set my stuff down at the table I was going to eat my lunch at. When I got back in line, of course, it was a long line. I waited a good 5 minutes to get my lunch. I ordered a cheeseburger and some fries and went to sit down at my table. However, when I was on my way to my table, I noticed the burger was slowly morphing into a car, but not just any car. As you already guessed by now, the burger was shaped as an Opel. I knew I wasn't hallucinating. I went to the table and sat down on the far left of it. I had to be left alone. I am not a shy person, I just had to sit alone that day during lunch.

When I finished my lunch, I threw away my trash and took my tray up to the stack on the counter. The counter was in front of a window. This window had a room where a cafeteria worker cleans the trays after the students had used them. I grabbed my things and walked outdoors. Our school has a courtyard where the students hang out. I went to one of the tables and sat down. I opened my computer to watch some YouTube videos. After I logged into my computer, I opened the YouTube app. When the site loaded up, I went to go watch a video. I saw a video called "How to be an expert at Crossy Road". I was very sucky at Crossy Road anyway, so I gave the video a watch. But when I clicked on the video, text appeared on the screen saying "Video unavailable. You cannot watch this video because of a copyright from Opel. Opel? Opel, the car company? What the hell does Crossy Road even have to do with a foregin car manufacturer? I couldn't watch that video, so I went to click on another video. However, every single video I clicked on had the same text. At this point, I had enough. I had to see that commercial that my friend was talking about. 15 minutes later, the bell rang and I went to my last class of the day. I was so pissed off that I just wasted like 20 minutes looking at the same message over and over during lunch. I went to my last class of the day, and when I walked in the classroom, I saw some weird text on the board. It said "Opel would like your address to your house." while it was flashing in green and black. At this point, I was done. I needed to see that commercial.

After a long day at school, the bell rang and we had to go home. But just as I was walking out the school door, I noticed that the cars in the parking lot were no longer Opel cars. Instead, this time, they were the normal cars that are always in the parking lot. I walked onto the bus after a seemingly normal day at school. Since it was Friday and I had no homework, I did my chores and went to my computer. I checked my Gmail, and saw a weird email in my inbox. It was labeled by a dot. The email was just a ton of random letters in one run-on sentence. I scrolled all the way down to the bottom and there was some spanish text with what looks like a secret code. The text when translated said "Opel knows your secret. We know you've never seen that commercial your friend of a friend of yours emailed you, and you must see it right now!". I was over this shit. I had to watch that commercial. The email said to watch the video at 12:00 midnight. I had my drive open and I tried to find the video. I had finally found it, but before I watched it, I had to look up Opel. I knew that Opel had a promotion with Pixar during the release of Cars, which was indeed true. I watched the Opel commercials before I watched the one that was in my Google Drive. Some of them were not in english, so it was hard to tell what the cars were saying. I know I mentioned earlier that Opel is a german car company, so those commercials were most likely in German. I watched all the videos I could find on this promotion. After I watched all the videos, it was 12:00 am exactly, so I knew I had to watch the mysterious commercial.

I found the commercial in my Drive, and clicked on the video. The video started. It began with text on the screen saying "Disney/Pixar Cars: Opel Commercial. Not to be shown to the public. 04/12/2006." (April 12, 2006.). The commercial began with Lightning McQueen driving down the road in Radiator Springs. Sheriff, the police car was chasing him. This went on for about 30 seconds before going to the next scene. McQueen arrived at the Radiator Springs Drive-In Movie Theater. When he arrived there, he saw Mater watching a movie. I had no idea what the movie was so I kept playing the clip. Lightning then began to say something to Mater. "Mater, some new cars are coming to Radiator Springs!" said Lightning. Mater cheered with glee. "Yee-hoo! We haven't had visitors in a long time. Not even since... What year is this?" I almost busted out laughing. The clip then showed a scene where three cars, which I assume were Opel cars. There were usually three Opels in the commercials. They came in three colors: green, blue, and gray. The blue one was named Astra, while the gray one was named Zafira. The green one is usually named Meriva, but in this commercial, he had a different name. A name that was difficult to pronounce. The three cars pulled into the drive in theater. When the cars pulled in, Astra noticed Lightning McQueen. "Are you Mr. Lightning McQueen?" he asked. "Why, yes I am." McQueen replied. "Is there anything I can help you with?" he followed. "Yes there is." Astra said. What Astra said next nearly made me puke. He asked "Are you a cannibal?". Why the hell would Lightning McQueen be a freaking cannibal? Lightning had a disgusted look on his face. "What?" he asked. "You know what I said!" Astra yelled. McQueen looked super confused, as he still didn't know what Astra was talking about. Astra was mad. "I'm gonna ask you again. ARE YOU A CANNIBAL?!" he yelled. McQueen was confused. He had no idea what Astra was saying. He also didn't know what a cannibal was. Since there are no humans in the cars world, this was super confusing. McQueen was a little scared. "No. W-why? What's a cannibal?" he asked Astra in a scared voice. "This!", said Astra in a demonic voice. He became super angry and his jaw became wide open as he started driving towards McQueen. McQueen tries to get away but fails, as he gets a flat tire. He couldn't move. Just then Astra showed up and McQueen turned around. This is where the commercial gets very disturbing. Since McQueen couldn't go anywhere, Astra literally opens his mouth so wide to reveal sharp and pointy teeth. Astra drives closer to McQueen, and within 5 seconds, he reaches McQueen. Astra was right behind McQueen, and as he was behind him, he literally eats McQueen until there's no remnants of him left. Luckily, there was no blood. In fact, there was no blood at all in this commercial. I nearly vomited. Mater and Sheriff were shocked by this. "Oh my god, they killed McQueen!" Mater said in shock. Sheriff was angry at Astra. "You Bastard!" he said. Oddly, their voices sounded nothing like Larry the Cable Guy nor Michael Wallis. Instead, they sounded like the children from South Park.

"Who's next?" Astra said in a demonic-like voice. Mater and Sheriff screamed and drove to Ramone's shop very fast. As they were speeding on down there, they drove past a billboard that said "Spend $200.00 on an Opel vehicle, or I will be in your nightmares tonight!". There was a car on the billboard. It had sharp, pointy teeth, a Knife in its front left wheel, and red blood-shot eyes. Sheriff and Mater finally made it to Ramone's. When they arrived, Ramone showed up. "Hola Mater! Hola Sheriff! How's it going?" he asked. "Not good!" said Mater. "Astra just ate McQueen!" Sheriff screamed. Just then, Doc, Flo, Luigi, and Red showed up. They overheard what Mater said. Zafiria came speeding towards them, and he eats the cars in Radiator Springs, and Ramone's House of Body Art! As before, there was no blood. Then suddenly, they began eating the rest of the cars in town, and they were eating the town itself! Just then, a portal opened. Astra, Zafiria, and Meriva drove into the portal. Where did the portal lead to, you may ask? It lead to hell. After the cars drove into the portal, they entered the deep depths of hell. When they arrived, text came on screen that said "Opel corporation comes from the deep depths of hell, and soon you will arrive here too. See the new movie Cars, coming out when you die!", followed by some demonic laughter. The screen then cuts to black for a few seconds and the clip showed the weirdest image I've ever seen! The image was of the Opel cars with Mater and McQueen, but the cars had no eyes or mouths. Text flashed on the screen, but it was just a bunch of letters. I did manage to find four words in the text. The four words were: Hell, is, upon, and us. The commercial then cuts to black and ends with "Copyright 666 Disney/Pixar".

I wondered what the hell I just saw, and why Opel made that commercial. I had trouble sleeping the night after, but eventually went to sleep. The next day, I went to upload the video to YouTube, but when I tried to look for the video, it was gone. I've looked so hard on my computer, even checking my files. Nothing. After I gave up all hope of finding the video, I heard a knock on my door. There was an envelope. It had a letter inside. The letter read, "Your only escape is burning in the depths of hell!". I contacted Disney and Pixar, with no luck at all. I even tried contacting Opel, with even more bad luck. I thought my friend said that Pixar had the commercial locked away in their headquarters. I wondered how he even got this commercial to begin with.

As of this day, the commercial still haunts my mind and comes back once in awhile in my nightmares.

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