Oh Damn

The date is 7/8/19 and I have holed up in the local 7/11.

The virus is spreading to everyone in my neighborhood, and I think it might go global.

It all started 5 days ago when a kind old lady screamed "OH DAMN" after getting scared by her family. Then, she couldn't stop and neither could anyone who heard it. Basically, there was a chorus of "oh damn!"

I have stuffed my ears with toilet paper I found in the 7/11 bathroom in high hopes of not getting infected.

Shit. One day my friend Delkin Shmidder knocked on the door screaming and crying. He said he crashed his unicycle and his ass crushed the big lollipop he had.

The reason he crashed his bike was because a scary man threw a pebble in the road according to him.

I gave him a lollipop off of the shelf, but sadly there was only sex novelty lollies and he had a big purple dick lollipop and it was kind of weird but whatever he was happy.

As I waited in the 7/11 for possible help from the oh damn virus zone I drank all of the Sprite because I wanted to have the world's biggest belch.

My tummy hurt, I had over 50 sprites and it wasn't looking good. I let it go and the world's most horrifying thing happened.

BURRRRRRGGGLLLLHRRRPPPPPPSHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRHURRRRRRRPPPPPAEVGGRHGEGRGGRRJRKROOOHPERRRRRRUPPRRRRRRHHHBELLCHHHHEHRRRRRR

Think of that noise for about 3 hours. Once it was finally over I felt amazing and Delkin was horrified yet thought it was awesome.

Until..

"hey, that scary man said something to me!!"

oh shit..

"he just yelled OH DAMN OH DAMN OH DAMN!!"

DELKIN N-

Oh damn.

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Credited to Lockwood85 

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