The SpongeBob Bootleg DVD...

Have you ever heard of SpongeBob SquarePants, that classic cartoon that first aired in 1999 that everyone knows of? Well, I've heard of it too, even watching a few seasons from time to time. However, one time I bought the first season on a bootleg DVD and made a severe mistake that I'll never forget. Here is what happened...

So it all started when I left the carnival down the road (terrible place by the way, go anywhere but to that carnival!). At the time, I was in a very sour mood from all the screaming sugared-up 8-year-olds, loud generic pop songs playing from the run-down light-covered ferris wheels, and burning grease I thought was 'food'. I was caught up by a homeless man who had a large, greyed-out beard, red eyes like he was about to cry himself into a trip, a stench of expired groceries and rat venom, and a deep, crooked voice that could only perform 14% volume... In the middle of a shouting crowd!

"Do you have time for this kids show right here?" he shivered, holding a blank white disc with 'spongbob 1' written on it. I knew he wanted me to buy it so he could eat, and looking back, I probably should have been softer on him, but with the day I had before, it was not that nice anyways. "No thanks, I'm okay" I passively rejected, trying not to scream murder at him. "I assure you that it contains good messages and funny jokes for your kids" he desperately replied, trying to change my mind. He not only failed miserably, but finally made me snap.

"I DON'T WANT YOUR STUPID SPONGEBOB DVD, OKAY?" I busted out my vocal cords. The man slumps down and quietly lets out "Okay, if you insist... Just wanted to entertain you, but it's fine, I guess" before dipping his head into his knees and softly sobbing. I stormed off, just wanting to slam the door shut and put on Hoops (because I really think it's pretty funny, even if anyone says otherwise). When I approached the pedestrian crossing lights though, I started to feel guilty. Maybe he did want to make me happy and I was just being too mean? I walked all the way back to where the man was, still feeling glum, and told him "Okay, I'll give you a chance". I told him where my house was if he needs me (or if I need him, but more on that later) and asked "Now, what's the cost?". He hesitated to speak, but then answered "Only 4 for one", and I gave him $4 for a DVD of SpongeBob Season One... Oh, how I wish I never did that... EVER!

I got back home and turned on the TV and my DVD player (technically a Blu-Ray player though) and set the TV to the DVD insertion menu. Then, I opened the player, popped the disc in, rolled the disc holder in (or just pushed the Open/Close button to be literal) and sat back for some fun. Here is what I saw...